Still reviewing the text, but have spent time today making adjutants and grammatical corrections to PC descriptions. The authors went well out of their way to badly write these otherwise interesting details in such way as to be "inclusive" of incorrect pronouns. "they" and "their" "we" "us, "our" are ALL PLURAL and their use for an individual (a word which indicates only one of anything) is grammatically incorrect and detracts from the flow of the store or description.

I get it. In some cases you did back flips to to avoid declaring a gender, and allowing the player to make that choice. Most pre-gens (up until now) are usually gender declared. that is still NOT a problem to most gamers,) But , the result is badly written expressions.

Here is an example of how a bit of text could have been better.

Original: "Average height, athletic build, wears designer jeans and shirts, and loafers with no socks. They look like they spent hours making themselves look like they just rolled out of bed." Suggested alt.: "Average height, athletic build, wears designer jeans and shirts, and loafers with no socks. Hours are spent getting "just rolled out of bed" look."

and Original: "Wayne Jeffries, their nephew. They're fond of the kid but wish he'd gone into something useful, like tech or medicine. Harper is reluctantly going on this trip at the request of his sister, Wayne's mother, who is currently in hospital." (BTW Here you declared Harper to be male with "his sister, Wayne's mother" similar indications appear on other character sheets. )

Suggested Alt: "Harper is very fond of nephew Wayne Jeffries, but wish he had chosen a more practical field, such as medicine or technological studies. At the insistence of Wayne's mother, (currently hospitalized) Harper is reluctantly traveling to California. "

I'm not a professional editor, but I did manage to pass all my English, Grammar, and essay classes up to and inducing college. But I'd be wiling to take on the job for a small fee.

Intrigued by Seth's review, I will continue with a thorough read through. I'll drop in again when I have with an overall comment.