First of all about the setting: Hell, the setting is amazing. In the style of The Wolf among us or the comic book series that Fables that inspired the game characters from classical fairytales get evicted from their homeland Arcadia and thrown into the dark reality of 1940s Noir world. I love that setting and there are a lot of good ideas included in the PDF how to fuse the genres together.
Editing, Layout, …, overall presentation:
I will make it short: The overall presentation of ‘Once upon a crime' is just awful. The layout is awful (even using LibreOffice something more involved should have been possible in something like 15 minutes), the texts were crawling with errors and badly written. I am not even a native speaker and yet I found literally dozens of errors, spelling and grammar and whatnot. The texts are confusing and redundant, a lot of information is scattered through various chapters, including the starting scenario, the language is bloated and fuzzy. I feel like from the 43 pages of the PDF at least 10 could be saved by avoiding redundant information and set phrases and use sharper formulations. There is an editor listed in the credits, but I wouldn’t be surprised if nobody looked over the texts after they were first written.
As much as I want to love ‘Once upon a crime’, this just spoils it for me. I really hope the author decides to take a close look at his creation, and spends the time and love this setting and ideas would deserve.